Modern Things Romans Would Love #1: Social Media (especially Instagram and Twitter)

It is quite funny that actors in Roman society were considered only a step above prostitutes. Indeed many actors ran a side business as prostitutes, so bereft of opportunities, and funds, they were in acting. I say it is funny because to an extent all Roman life was an act, an elaborate performance. If you

Modern Things Romans Would Love #2: Pro-Wrestling

The roaring crowd, their eyes fixated on the centre of a theatre, a ring (so-called even though it is quite square), a cage, a pit, all waiting with bated breath to see their favourite fighters, their favourite personalities, come out and put their bodies on the line for glory, victory and entertainment. I am, of

Modern Things Romans Would Love #3: Fast Food

The Romans fucking loved their nosh. There is no doubt about it. I always maintain that Latin derived cultures have taken from Romans three fundamentals that we could all learn from. Forgetting all squabbles, forgetting all divisions, races, religions you only need three things to live a good life – good food, good wine and good fucking. The Romans got this.

Modern Things Romans Would Love #6: Travel and Tourist Tat

Archaeological evidence from across the Roman world has dug up trinkets from various other parts of the world; Jewellery, figurines, carvings, etc. Basically they found everything but fridge magnets, keyrings and postcards. Not only did Romans have a penchant for travelling the world – sometimes for leisure, sometimes for education and sometimes because they had to because they were soldiers – but they also liked to bring back trinkets for their families. Roman-era tourist tat actually existed.

Modern Things Romans Would Love #7: Gender and Sexuality Liberation

This is one that’s going to piss off so many pseudo-classicists, the ones that come from that lens of neo-classicism. Neo-classicism was an idea that sprung up, predominantly, in Victorian-era Britain, where conservatism and austerity were things to be admired. Meanwhile, behind the scenes and down back alleys you’d be getting wankered on bathtub gin

Modern Things Roman Would Love #8: Energy Drinks

What’s a day in the life of a Roman like and why did they really, really need energy drinks?

Modern Things Romans Would Love #9: Drawing Dicks

You know how it is! Especially if you’re a bloke but, come on ladies, we know you did it too! Don’t think I don’t see you non-binary people! Oh, sure, it’s an elephant. Any dick is an elephant if you draw two eyes on it!

Modern Things Romans Would Love #10: Easily Available Abortion

Roman Top Ten, Modern Edition!

What’s the best way to get people, nowadays, to relate to the Romans? How about ten articles detailing the top ten aspects of modern bullshit that the Romans would have loved?